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When my parents first decided to come to America, they balked. Frozen by rumors of failure and cynicism. Vladimir and Dina were first presented with an opportunity to move to the United States in 1990. Yet, the fear of the unknown, of a wrong decision, the fear of struggle clouded their minds. Hope and fear paralyzed them, pulling them in separate directions. Successful stories from relatives who moved before them and fearful stories from those who failed… my parents had to decide. Staying was comfortable and familiar. Going would allow their children to lead a healthier, fuller future. 

When a healthy future confronts us, a familiar past clings on. Humans are habitual, we tend to become addicted to familiarity. Even when that familiarity is destructive to our lives. Along our journey, we often become heroes or villains to our own happiness. Heroic by propelling ourselves forward, painting a picture of all the possibilities. Villainous in brewing fear, hopelessness, and whispered thoughts of impossibility. One of the hardest and most important decisions of a therapeutic journey is to decide to do what is healthiest over what is easiest. Typically, that decision is the least familiar and least comfortable. When deciding to heal past wounds and trauma, the journey will ask you to leave the familiar habits and to create new ones. To learn a new language to speak and to embrace a healthier environment to live in. It can be paralyzing, and it takes a great deal of strength to overcome the siren call of comfortable. But life is fullest, most beautiful, in its growth and surprises.

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Author Alina Garbuz

More posts by Alina Garbuz
Tulsa Trauma Counselor

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